Monday, June 4, 2012

The Scene of the Crime

The other morning, I was out early and came across this sight.

Ever the investigative journalist, I had to turn around and get a closer look.

These skid marks make no sense to me
Bad photograph, but centered shots are hard to achieve while driving.

Talk about rotten luck.

From the looks of it, some yahoo lost control of their car, nailed the front end of this parked car, spun around, and nailed the car again, this time on the back side door.  The skid marks have me completely baffled.  The only way I see an explanation for these patterns is that the car made a pirouette (or perhaps a triple salchow) with a bad landing.  Or there is the the possibility that there was a second gunman car.

On my second time around, I noticed that another passerby had also stopped to survey the scene.  I realized that I was a solitary driver in an unmarked car, suspiciously pulled over, taking pictures.  It was only then that I became acutely aware of how some might find it odd I was taking pictures from my car.  Every hack cop movie of the 80s hinged on the premise that the criminal always returns to the scene of the crime.  I had nothing to do with this collision, and suddenly I was feeling like a suspect.

Witness:  "Officer, there was a suspicious woman who stopped and took photos."
Officer:  "Do you have a description of this woman?"
Witness:  "Well, she was in a huge minivan.  And she was incredibly gorgeous."
Officer:  "Thank you.  We'll put out an APB for a hot mom in a minivan."

Not wanting to be on the lam for a crime I didn't commit, I drove slowly by, rolled down the window and marveled over this accident with her.

Me:  "Crazy, isn't?"
Witness:  "Yes!  Do you think they know about it yet?"
Me:  "Doubt it.  What rotten luck."

And off I drove, my good name cleared.

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