Friday, July 6, 2012

The Circle of Life is No Disney Movie

Have you ever been in a dead sleep, only to be jolted awake by the sound of something that clearly has no place in your home?  And not sure of what it is, you lie in bed, your heart pounding, eyes open, listening for a clue that will help you figure out what you just heard?

That’s how our morning started. 

5:38am.  An unnatural screeching and scuffling sound in the master bathroom snaps me awake.  My first panicked thought is that it’s an intruder, but as I surface to full awake, the screeching continues, and I know that this is no burglar.  It sounds like an angry animal.  BH wakes up right about now, jumps out of bed, and runs to the bathroom.  He’s impulsive that way, always thinking about protecting us, sweet man.  Me, I would’ve played dead in the bed until I was sure any move was smarter than hiding under the blankets.

As he runs into the bathroom, I yell, “it’s outside,” so as to give him more courage to enter the bathroom.  And that’s when I hear him yell, “HEY!!!!!” 

All caps don’t do it justice.  It was more like a roar.  I could tell he was yelling out the window, and by then I was lucid enough to know that there was no threat to us.  He was yelling at some animals outside.  Which then lead to my next thought, “are you seriously yelling at the top of your voice out the window at 5:38 in the morning?  When did I marry the cranky old man in the neighborhood?”

So of course, I told him to pipe down.  He was so loud that by now our neighbors have either determined that BH gets unhinged when he loses sleep or he has anger issues.  Great. 

That’s when he told me.  A raccoon was attacking a cat, up in our trees. 

No way did I want to witness that, so I stayed in bed, listening.  According to BH, it was pretty clear that the cat was losing.  They were a good 20 feet above the ground, and no amount of yelling was going to stop that raccoon.  So BH closed the windows and came back to bed. 

Fortunately, the kids were all at Grandma’s this week, so they missed out on this potentially traumatic display of Wild Kingdom.  This is the view from M and P’s second story bedroom.  I don’t know how that cat got dragged that high into those trees, but the carnage all took place precisely outside their window.  

3rd and 4th blind down...that's where it all went down.

After BH came back to bed, he proceeded to fall right back asleep, while I stayed awake and tried to drown out the horrific raccoon growls and screeches that continued for 15 more minutes.  Here’s what it sounded like, only loud enough for us to think it was happening in our bathroom.

First thing this morning, before letting Charley out, I went outside to check the yard for a cat carcass.  Because, if there’s one thing we know about our dog, we know he loves him some dead animal.

No more late nights outside for you, my friend.

I hope I don’t see any lost cat signs around the neighborhood, because I’d hate having to tell the owner what happened to their beloved pet.  Or maybe it’s better that they never know?  What do you think?

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